Even though the movie was a box office disappointment, only grossing $6.8 million it’s opening weekend, I thoroughly enjoyed Jennifer’s Body (and yes, that may be the straightest thing you’ll ever hear me say). I fully expected another predictable horror flick that takes itself way too seriously and rehashes one of the same old tired plots I’ve seen a thousand times before. I am a horror snob! It’s my favorite genre, but I am so rarely satisfied by Hollywood’s modern offerings. Jennifer’s body is classified by Wikipedia as a “black comedy horror.” The term aptly applies. I love black comedy, but it’s such a razor’s edge for a writer to balance when writing a story that’s both funny and scary that too often the end result is neither funny nor scary, but just 2 hours of awkward and disturbing. I felt like the film’s writer Diablo Cody (writer of Juno!) and director Karyn Kusama pulled off the balancing act masterfully.

The movie grabs your attention right off the bat with talk of demons and a teenage girl beating the living shit out of orderlies in a mental instituton. It’s actually the demonized teenager, Anita “Needy” (Amanda Seyfried) who’s narrating the story from the asylum. As beautiful as Megan Fox is, I was happy to realize she was a major player in someone else’s tale and not the lead character in the film, herself. If you are a fan, however, there’s some pretty hot stuff in this film without seeming like exploitation of her good looks was their only motivation for making it.

Megan’s character, Jennifer, the popular flag girl, takes her long time friend Anita to see Low Shoulder, a struggling Indie band. The band kidnaps Jennifer after the show and sacrifices her to Satan, (using a ritual they found on the internet, ha ha) hoping for a little infernal help to boost their popularity. While the ritual seemed to be a success, the band failed to realize that Jennifer didn’t fit the primary criteria for a virgin sacrifice, yeah, she was so not a virgin. That one small, ovelooked detail caused a succubus to resurrect and inhabit the girl’s corpse. The next day Jennifer’s back at school with a vengeance, literally, needing to feed on flesh to sustain her new she-devil form. Meanwhile, the band capitalizes on a tragic fire that they caused, at the backwoods bar they were playing at that night, by writing a tear-jerker ballad that tops the charts (as an anthem of support for the grieving town).

There are plenty of smart laughs in the film, but not to the point of distraction from the creepy scenario that the storyline plays out in. It actually is kinda scary. My usual spot-on predictions were misdirected by the film’s pleasant unpredictability in spots. The film climaxes (huh, huh, I said climax) with a kick-ass ending that made me almost wish for a sequel!

Jennifer’s Body is worth seeing and so is Megan Fox’s (if you’re into that sort of thing). Color me pleasantly surprised!

And it was made with a flip video. Yeah.

The Brother’s Darqly have been examining the career of this intriguing little super-starlet for a while now. Ever since we began to see her twisted antics at live appearances on awards shows coupled with her outlandish sense of style. At first listen she could easily be overlooked as another pop princess, but there is a truly artistic heart beating beneath that glittery chest, a slightly dark heart at that! When I heard her collaberative effort with Marilyn Manson (a killer remix of the song Love Game) and watched her bleed out at the end of a live performance at the MTV video music awards from a giant chandalier staged to look like it fell on her, I knew she was a kindred spirit.

A friend and I braved the treacherous ice and snow to make the 4 hour trek to St. Louis to see Lady GaGa live Thursday night (he won VIP tickets from Power 96.5 and asked me to go with him).

I fell in love with the opening band, Semi Precious Weapons, they were irreverant and crude. I can only describe their lead singer as Iggy Pop, Ziggy Stardust, Eddie Izzard and a dash of Cruella DeVille. Their glam/punk persona commanded attention when they took the stage. They beat us all into submission with their crass lyrics and manic sound (just the way I like it). They reminded me of some of the great bands that 1st gave punk it’s wings.

Jason Derulo’s smooth, sultery R & B vocals filled the elegant Fox Theater next. I was impressed to learn that he’s been performing since he was 5 and wrote his 1st song at age 8! His hopeful message in song reminded me that maybe love is worth the risk and if love doesn’t blossom, at least you got laid and there aint nothin’ wrong with that. His slick dance moves made the girls (and some of the boys) swoon. Remember, the poor guy was swimming in a sea of gays. While he didn’t seem uncomfortable, he never missed an opportunity to remind the audience how straight he is (can you blame him?), but he did throw us a bone when he ripped his shirt off at the end! Usher would’ve been proud!

It was time for Lady Gaga! The moment of truth had arrived..I may have had an ulterior motive for coming to the show..I was determined to settle the hermaphrodite rumors once and for all (yes, that’s a joke)! However, her opening number featured an array of beautiful male and female dancers dressed in androgynous body stockings that made it look like they had no genetalia. At the close of the song she was kind enough to dispell all the myths by informing us that she is, in fact, endowed with an incredibly large cock! Then she proceeded to feign stroking it!! The crowd roared with laughter and applause.

The show was packed with glitter and gizmos, seemingly holographic imagery and an almost performance-art style that would make Andy Warhol shed a complimentary tear. There were costumes a drag queen would die for and seamless choreography, sweaty hot dancing girls and boys (did I mention the boys?) To sum up the theatrics, I felt like I’d died and gone to Barbarella! It was glorious!

Mid-show, GaGa sat down to play a smoldering baby grand that looked like a war torn piece of wreckage – the Frankenstein of pianos (It’s what other pianos have bad dreams about). But when she began to play, the irony of bringing forth such beautiful music from something so ugly, subtly drove home the tour’s message about false perceptions and it also removed all doubt that this is a gifted musician before you.

There was a lot of playful banter with the crowd, but she did have some empowering things to say to her adoring fans. She encouraged them not to be crushed by the criticism of small minds that can’t see them for who they really are (which is kind of the theme of her Monster Ball tour). I was moved by her genuine affection for them and her compassion for people in general (She is currently teaming up with Virgin mobile to find housing for homeless people in the U.S.).

The infamous reverend blah blah and his Kansas based gestapo had every intention of raining fire and brimstone on the St. Louis show because of GaGa’s enormous popularity in the homosexual community and what he considers to be her general ungodliness. However, God apparently canceled their scheduled protest on account of snow! (If they can’t stand the cold, I can think of somewhere warmer they can go). I found her sense of humor and cheeky way of dealing with her critics endearing. Make no mistake, the Lady is not afraid to show her teeth! The moral of this story “darqlings” is that Lady GaGa may not have a penis, but she’s definitely got a set of monster balls and I give her props for that! If you can’t afford to catch this tour, sell a kidney! It’s worth it!

Thanks Dennis and Power 96.5 for an evening to remember!

“Terr and Psychals Sessions”  the first official EP is available now, and we are wrapping up studio work on the full length LP right now.

It’s truly an honor to be distributed alongside some of our favorite projects like:

Godhead

Celldweller

The Dreaming

Blue Stahli

Look for more updates very soon.

Don’t forget, you can remix xXRx for a limited time, you can get the files right here on darqpress in the remixes section.

Also, check us out on Myspace

After Halloween: Resurrection was released, I had given up on the Halloween franchise. What used to be a carefully shot, expertly timed thrill had been reduced to a laughable parody worthy of a Golden Raspberry Award. Upon hearing of Rob Zombie’s plans to remake the franchise in his image, I was startled. At the time, I hadn’t seen House of 1,000 Corpses or The Devil’s Rejects, so the only exposure I had to Mr. Zombie was his music. I found it difficult to translate the imagery and atmosphere of his music into film, let alone a character I was as familiar with as Michael Myers. I was understandably skeptical until I saw the teaser. The tone of the trailer was familiar, accurate, but most importantly, good! I began to think that if anyone could revitalize Haddonfield, it was this Robert Zombie fellow.

And then, I saw the movie.

Rob Zombie’s Halloween is easily one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. The focus on young Michael was distracting, as was the casting. It also sucked away everything creepy about the character…it gave him a (bad) reason to return as a hulking psycho killer. I couldn’t help feeling as if this whole film was Rob Zombie’s shameless attempt at some sort of catharsis, inserting himself into the movie as young Michael just to vent his own childhood rage. It felt cheap and flavorless. To be quite honest, I could go on for hours about how terrible this movie was. Lucky for you, however, this is not a review of Halloween.

The trailer for Halloween II debuted on the Internet. Instead of approaching the feature and advertising surrounding it with cautious optimism as I had the first, I dismissed it entirely. I was convinced it would be utter trash. However, as a horror fan, I was essentially obligated to give it a shot. What I saw proved my suspicions incorrect and I’ve never been so happy to be so wrong.

Halloween II begins in a hospital, the setting for the original Halloween II produced by John Carpenter. After some startling imagery (and stunning use of the Moody Blues’ “Nights In White Satin”), our protagonist Laurie Strode (Scout Taylor-Compton) wakes up, proving the first few minutes to be a dream. This clever fake-out serves as both a successor and an homage to the style and tone of the original sequel, while seemingly pointing out that this is NOT a remake of the previous film entitled Halloween II. From here on out, it’s clear that the story of Michael Myers (Tyler Mane and Chase Wright Vanek) is moving in a brand new direction clear of rehashed and reused material.

The film goes on to establish how Michael’s night of terror has affected the survivors. Returning characters are scarred, both physically and mentally. Dr. Samuel Loomis (Malcolm McDowell) is no longer the vigilante psychiatrist fearlessly chasing after Michael to save Laurie’s life, we’ve known for years. Instead, he has capitalized on his involvement in the tragedy at Haddonfield by writing a book exploiting the privacy of those involved. In this book, Loomis has published a little-known secret about the Myers case: the fact that Laurie Strode is the younger sister of Michael Myers.

Inevitably, nearly a year after the events of the previous Halloween night, Laurie Strode reads the book and finds out who she really is. This triggers her own Michael-esque descent into madness, quietly offering to the viewer that perhaps this madness is a family trait.

The only aspect of this film that rubs me the wrong way is the involvement of Michael’s mother as a hallucination. It allowed for a very clever depiction of Michael as a confused child lumbering around in an adult’s body, but the desperate need to please “Mommy” was far too reminiscent of Jason Vorhees. It was almost tacky, however it was justified in the film’s final scene.

In short, this movie worked. The difference between this movie and Zombie’s original Halloween is nearly as drastic as the difference between his first two movies. Nothing was rushed, everything seemed meticulously planned. It was very tight, very cohesive, very sound…expertly edited! The cinematography was beautiful, the dialog far less campy, the acting very natural, and the emotion very real. I can’t say enough good about this movie and it just goes to show that any franchise can be saved if enough care is put into it.

Here’s hoping the same goes for Freddy!

So bear with us as we make this into what it was always intended to be…
Luc1d